poetry

my lyrical demise part XIV

Step the fuck back… Give me a goddamn minute. It’s time to reclaim. My thoughts. My life. I’m stubborn, like the ram inside of me. As I tried to conquer. The voices of a million memories. And useless tongues of nonsense, that didn’t matter. Screaming within my head. I gave it hell. But it gave me more. Until I couldn’t take it, anymore. And I realize the troubles, it causes my loved ones. Swallowing that pill. May make me feel weak. But it takes strength… To admit you need help. Through the panic attacks. Sleepless nights. Days run into each other. With two hours of sleep… In between them. A heavy metal concert… Constantly playing in my head. Like that time in Pittsburgh. August of 2003. When the crowd went wild. The moment Korn, started playing faget. But lacking the fun. I never meant to fall. But I sure in the hell… Ain’t staying down.
-Joshua Ryan Stewart

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